Hey! It's Another Christmas Song!

Marra said it best when she wrote: "I'm sure I'm not the only one who wants to die when she hears Christmas music about the sweet baby Jesus and bells ringing and some reclusive, obese felon breaking into my house before Thanksgiving Day." She's write. Christmas Music is essentially the siamese twin of Christian Rock: you don't need talent or thought or creativity to be successful at it, since it's just shameless pandering to a group that will buy into just about anything as long as you share similar views. But fear not, for Saviour comes in the form of Stephen Colbert.

The album starts off promisingly with Colbert singing about cashing in on Christmas through music. He's a pretty convincing crooner, and the song could have very well been lifted right out of the sixties, if the lyrics didn't give it away. He chews the scenery in his duet with Jon Stewart, but it's ultimately the latter who steals the show with his flawed but wonderfully charming and earnest singing. And it doesn't hurt that his line about candles made me pee myself a little bit. If this doesn't replace Adam Sandler's auditory clusterfuck as the unofficial anthem of Hannukah, I will personally kick him in the matza balls.

I know most of you cringe at the idea of Toby Keith, but he's surprisingly self-aware on "Have I Got A Present For You", a send up of both PC-obsessed lefties and the Christmas-crazy Right. Sadly, Willie Nelson is the most forgettable of them all, as he settles for a pleasant, but too-easy song about toking with the three wise men. I'm sorry, but really? Haven't we gotten the "Willie does Weed" jokes out of our system?

As you would probably guess, Feist delivers the albums highlight, as an angel singing about how she'll answer your prayers...at least, once an authorized prayer technician is available. I would have offered the title to John Legend, who offers us an R&B ballad about his sweet, sweet Nutmeg, but Stephen's interjections feel out of place and just a bit grating.

As a certain someone once said, it's not Christmas until you hear Elvis. I'm sure he meant Presley, but since Elvis is freakin' worm food (oh don't give me that crap. Even if he did fake his own death, which he didn't, it's been thirty goddamn years, you can't honestly tell me he's still kicking), Elvis Costello fills the void nicely. His voice is a nice complement to Stephen's, raspy and hard where Stephen's smooth. And the show-stopping collaboration with him and the rest of the cast provides the one and only genuinely emotional track of the album.

So is it a Christmas album? You're goddamn right it is. But honestly, have you seen the scheduled line-up of album releases? Believe me, this will easily be the best album to come out for a long, LONG while.

I'm Wearing My Lazypants Today, So Here Are Some Videos!

I'm gonna level with you here: I've been trying to make sure that I crank out a new blog post everyday, and so far I'm doing pretty well. But today, the weather outside was just Godtopus-awful, so I spent the entire day in bed, watching Donnie Darko and going through the Bonus Features of 30 Rock, my trusty laptop by my side. As of late, the DVD drive seems to be stuck, so I've taken to shaking my laptop in order to punish the little people inside. I'll work on that later. For now, here are some videos you should see.

First up is the trailer for the upcoming Straight to DVD movie adaptation for Dead Like Me. As much as the news of more Dead Like Me makes me feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside, really? a DVD movie? That's it? Even Jessica Simpson can crank out one out for theatres. And oh, how Reggie has grown.


Oh, you know me, I love me some Dr. Tran. Let this be a lesson to you all: Don't fuck with the shaved ice babies, or else Godtopus will kill you with his penis. And don't even get me started on what Godtopussy will do to you.


I'm pretty much obligated to post anything by Feist, so here's her new video for Honey Honey, chock full of puppet-y goodness! Hint hint, Meaux darling.


Since I've been cracked out on a 30 Rock bender for the last three days, enjoy this clip of the cast belting "Midnight Train to Georgia". Glerg.


And finally, a look at what Teen Wolf would have been like if it was 100% more honest. Werewolf Bar Mitzvah, spooky, scary...AW, DAMMIT, IT'S STUCK IN MY HEAD NOW.

Feist Counts To Four! Jimmy's Out The Door! Max Knocked To The Floor! It's News On Bar Napkins!

There are no words to describe this: Feist on Sesame Street is irrefutable proof that God exists. And God is good. Very good. (Towleroad)

Today's Celebrity Deathmatch brought to you by Micheal Ian Black and Tucker Max. Go, Michael!

Sarah Silverman and Jimmy Kimmel have called it quits after five years. I'm guessing she finally got around to watching The Man Show. (WIMB)

Pierce Brosnan sings like a walrus. I tried to reach him for a comment, but he was off looking for MAH BUKKIT! That is my last lolcat joke ever, okay? I'm not doing that shit ever again, YOU HEAR ME FUCKERS?! (BWE)

Dr. Horrible is out today! Good luck trying to actually watch the damn thing, though. The site's backed up like Bill Clinton's aorta. (Dr. Horrible)