ME! Yup, I got my Cal test back today. 78.3%! That's a C+! Can you fucking believe it? I didn't fail miserably like I thought I would. Woooo!
But now I'm scared. My doing well in math is in no way, shape or form compatible with the universe. If I can do well in Math, who's to say the Laws of Physics can't suddenly just look at each other and say "You know what? Fuck it. Let's change things up for shits and giggles". I am genuinely worried that my doing well in Calculus will result in the universe as we know it ceasing to exist. I would recommend stocking up on non-perishable food items and firearms.
Anyways, while I fashion myself a tinfoil hat and prepare for the endtimes, here's a look at my current level of unadulterated horror. MUSTACHE!
Okay, so today was the first day of my second semester at school. I have good news and bad news. Good news so far: One of my classes is online, so I never have to show up, and my English teacher is a firm believer in showing movies. Yay!
The bad news is that I have to take Calculus II, a mandatory course that I'm kinda hoping I don't fail. There's also the matter of my Western Civ course, which is where fun goes to die a slow and incredibly painful death. Thankfully, I had a desk in the back corner, so I just slept for about an hour. Suck on that, higher education!
Anyways, hopefully this semester I won't nearly fail every class I'm taking. All I have to do right now is maintain at least a 60 average until May 12th, and I'm good. Just one more year, just one more year...
Also, HotAndy, if you're reading this, you can suck it! Okay, for those who have no idea what I'm talking about here, HotAndy and I were having an email competition where we had to ask each other how the other was doing. And I almost won, but then he totally tricked me, and now I owe him a beej. Tricky jerkface...Oh well, I'm not exactly complaining here. In honour of him being a tricky, sexy beast, here's The Dresden Dolls with Mandy Goes To Med School.
And in really-super-fucking-cool news, Porn Team, the guys who distribute Pierre's DVDs, just announced their top selling movies, and Pierre's newest release was the highest seller. Apparently, it was the highest selling DVD they had in seven years, which is really cool. Feel free to post any and all words of congrats, praise, and anything that else that will swell his ego on his blog or in the comments below.
And finally, or no real reason at all...PENIS FISH!
Okay, totally random post today. Mostly because I have no energy to crap out another list. Terribly sorry. And for the record Stacey, Zac Efron is apparently very popular with both the teenybopper girls and the gays. This both confuses and saddens me, since he has the sex appeal of a pair of salt and pepper shakers that your grandmother owns.
Now, first off, I don't want to alarm anyone, but we learned something completely new in Calculus today and...well...I actually completely understood what the fuck she was talking about. EVERYBODY PANIC!
Seriously? What the crap? I feel like the entire universe is collapsing on itself. I mean, I suck at Cal, I suck it HARD. How the fuck am I actually doing well at something? This is just strange and confusing.
On another happy note, my CD drive on my laptop, after weeks of shaking, poking, praying, hitting, beating, inappropriate touching, curbing, kicking, punching, biting, teabagging, begging, scratching, pleading and headbutting, finally works again! No idea why I'm telling you this, just figured I might as well.
And also, some more good news. I'm trying desperately to move out of my parents house right now, since me and my mother are currently engaged in some sort of domestic cold war with one another, and it's getting kind of embarrassing now that I'm actually starting to develop a social life, and I have to explain that I live with my mother. Thankfully, my cousin has her own place, and since we seem to function on the same wavelength, I'm going over tomorrow, and if I manage to show her how helpful I can be, I may just be able to come in as a roommate. In due time people. If worse comes to worse, I'll just put an ad on Craigslist or something for anybody looking for a roommate.
For those of you who can't see it, that's a 61.7% there on the sheet. This is awesome for two reasons. A)This is the first Cal test that I didn't fail, and B)there is now a decent chance that I won't totally fail Cal. Theoretically, anyways. Basically, thanks to the Quebec government, if someone gets over 50% in Cal but is still failing, their term mark will be considered null and void, and the mark you get on your finals will be considered your total.
This means I have two options right now:
1. Now that I have some momentum, get the mark up over 60%, and actually start trying.
2. Coast with a mark between 50 and 60, then just study the crap out of my finals.
Right now, I'm leaning towards the latter. But for now, I'm busy doing my naked happy dance. In case you're wondering, no, this isn't a cute euphamism for masturbation, this is simply a dance I do when I'm happy and naked.
And on a completely random note, I finally got off my lazy ass and gave Pierre his b-day present. In all fairness, he was off in New York last week, so it's not like I'm gonna drive all the way down to New York to give him a gift. Anyways, I went against my "No Gift Certificats" rule and bought him one, if only because he lacks any trace of subtelty when it comes to stuff like this, and pretty much blatantly said that he wanted one. The only problem with this is that the woman writing it out asked for his name. His REAL name. Which I don't know. So I just gave her his stage name.
Hello, I'm Jeremy Feist, and I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing. For now, I'm juggling my family, my life, and my new career as the world's most unlikely gay porn star. It's complicated.
