Wednesday, January 13, 2010

This Is Gonna Be A New York Times Bestseller Someday, I Swear

I know that one of my New Year's Resolutions this year was to write a book, and let it be known that on January 13th, I have finally kinda sorta taken my first step towards that goal. It's not much; basically, just a quick opening I scribbled on an order pad between busy moments but still, tell me what you think I suppose. Unless you're just going to be a bitch for the sake of being a bitch, in which case, you can just shut the eff up.

This is not a story about love. Not anymore, anyway. This is not a story where a (boy/girl/whatever) meets a (boy/girl/whatever) and they date and go to the movies and fight and makeup on top of the (Eiffel Tower/Empire State Building/Roof of your local Denny's) and they all live happily ever after because of course they do. Granted, it's an extension of that story, but this isn't it. If you wish to read a story like that, by all means put this book down and head over to the romance section, where I'm sure you'll find one that prominently features a well-oiled Fabio on the cover.

No no, go ahead, see if I care...Jerk.

As I said, this is not a story about love; rather, this is a story about what comes after. When the love is gone. When all the things you like, or used to like, whatever the case may be, just don't make up for the fact that being around them is emotionally draining. When you receive less joy from giving them flowers than you do carving the word "WHORE" into the driver's-side door of their car. When you start to look back and see all the little hints that seemed to scream "Run, you idiot, run! Why would you purposely waste your time on someone who obviously couldn't give two shits about you?!"

This is not a story about love. Just ask Jude and Valerie.

Once again, I know it's not much, but it's something I scribbled down between slinging Budweiser at people. It's a start I suppose, right? Anyway, if I can get this done by the end of the year, that would be pretty amazing, wouldn't it?


Todd Klinck said...

Feist - write a fucking book. You are a brilliant, bizarre, absurd misfit (and I mean that in the most loving of ways)....

If I could write a book in 3 days and launch a career, and milk that one fucking book for 15 years of media attention (granted, I do have talent, but so do you), then so can you....

The first paragraph was great. All you need is time. Maybe. Take a 2 week vacation some time, lock yourself into a room with no internet or phones, and some weed, and write the fucking book.

Well, we all find our own processes... that was mine (except it was 3 days not 2 weeks, and back then, the internet existed, but mainstream people didn't know about it...)

DeWayne In San Diego said...

What an opening! Why? What struck me? Cant quite figure the direction you would take this, but I want to read more. I am intrigued!

Todd is right and he is the writer ;-) Good advice too, you get too involved on the project drop out of sight!

I dont think you can write a book with the distractions of the Social Web.

Hell hard to maintain a blog anymore!

"This is not a story about love. Just ask Jude and Valerie."

yes do tell, minus the love shit I am sure they will fuck each other crazy,all in perverted ways!

oh FYI I think Fabio is now Flabio ;-)

Lainie said...

Ooh, like it--I'd buy your book. Now go get to work.