Sunday, March 8, 2009

Kill, Fuck Or Marry: Day Light Savings Time Edition

There's really nothing special about this DSL edition, I just figured that since I'm now on my sixth KFM, I need to start tagging on real names instead of shitty little numbers. Anyways, rules and names!

1. You're given a list of three people
2. You have to choose who to kill, who to fuck and who to marry.
3. Suicide is not an option.
4. You have to do it for both the men AND the women. It's purely hypothetical, so quit being such a pussy.
5. If you need help making up your mind, you can click on the name to see a pic.

Jake Gyllenhaal, Channing Tatum or Chris Pine?

Portia de Rossi, Jenna Fischer or Amy Poehler?

Hugh Jackman, Javier Bardem or Jeffrey Dean Morgan?

Samantha Bee, Katie Couric or Rachel Maddow?

Roman Heart, Cameron Marhsall or Josh Vaughn?

Duffy, Santigold or M.I.A.?

Paul Rudd, John Krasinski or Jason Mewes?

Leave your answers in the comments!


Anna von Beaverplatz said...

Not too hard this week, except for how I'm really not up with my gay porn stars, and those last two:

1)Kill Chris Pine. He seems annoying.
Fuck Channing Tatum. I don't think I have to explain.
Marry Jake Gyllenhaal. He'd be sweet.

2)Kill Jenna Fischer, only because the other two have to be where they are.
Fuck Portia DeRossi. She seems like she'd be a wildcat in the sack.
Marry Amy Poehler. Funny & smart are my long-term ideals.

3)Kill Jeffrey Dean Morgan. Again, it's just the default position. Sorry JDF!
Fuck Javier Bardem. Latin lover, mee-yow.
Marry Hugh Jackman. He'd be fun! And I'd get to go to Australia.

4)Kill Katie Couric. Just on general principles.
Fuck Rachel Maddow. She's hot. And too smart for me.
Marry Samantha Bee. See? Long-term, funny.

5)Kill Josh Vaughan. He looks the least interesting.
Fuck Roman Heart.
Marry Cameron Marshall. He looks mischevious. And I like 'em a little skinnier.

6)Ugh. Kill them all.

7)Eep! I can't kill any of them! I love all of them! So, move to Utah, marry them all.

So concludes my $.02. Now, to homework and dishes! Thanks for the Sunday kick-start, Jeremy!

meaux said...

In K/F/M order...

1. Because his name makes me think he's a girl (how does Stockard Channing + Tatum O'Neal = boy?), plus he looks like a pretentious douche in the photo, Tatum / Pine (I'll try not to look at his creepy fake eyebrows) / Gyllenhaal (oooh, nice photo, Jeremy! Thanks!).

2. Aww, sorry Amy, but the competition is stiff here. Poehler / de Rossi (I would totally switch teams for a night with her!) / Fischer (Perhaps not as utterly fuckable as Portia, but I would totally have a blast with her.)

3. Again, nothing personal--you're just outmatched here, Jeffy. Morgan / Bardem / Jackman.

4. Sorry Rach; you're a very cool gal but I have no interest in politics. It wouldn't last. Maddow / Couric / Bee.

5. Oh, hello! Now, these are some dudes I can totally get behind (er, or vice versa, I suppose)! Umm, gosh...much as I like his first name, I'm gonna have to say Marshall (sorry, you're cute, but I'm forced to choose) / Vaughn / Heart.

6. Hmm, not too familiar with any of them, but MIA's Grammy outfit has soured me somewhat on her. I'll go MIA / Santigold / Duffy (my godtopus but she's cute, and I do like what little I've heard of her stuff.)

7. Sorry Jay, but this is an easy one. Mewes / Rudd (mmm, and it'll be FUN) / Krasinski. In fact, I wouldn't be opposed to a PB&J sandwich with a little meaux in the middle....hmmmm....

Rusty said...

Channing Tatum/ Chris Pine/ Jake Gyllenhaal
(Chris Pine is very pretty, but Gyllenhaal seems like the more interesting person)

Amy Poehler/ Portia de Rossi/ Jenna Fischer
(This was tough, because I love Ellen so I had to decide if it was better if she was cheated on or had her wife die. I choose cheated on.)

Jeffery Dean Morgan/ Javier Bardem/ Huge Ackman
(I have a thing for straight men unafraid of singing and dancing. It's a weakness.)

Katie Couric/ Rachel Maddow/ Samantha Bee
(Um, yeah.)

Josh Vaughn/ Roman Heart/ Cameron Marshall
(Vaughn looks like he's got a receding hair line. Sorry, dude.)

Santigold/ M.I.A/ Duffy
(I didn't want to leave M.I.A's baby motherless. And I've seen Duffy live and she's pretty damn cute.)

Jason Mewes/ Paul Rudd/ John Krasinski
(Is this even a real question?)

Marra Alane said...

In K/F/M order:

1. Kill all of them. Seriously, minus Brokeback Mountain, none of them have every accomplished anything that had any redeeming value.

2.Kill Jenna, even though she's super cute, fuck Portia cuz she knows her way around the vajay, marry Amy because she's the shit.

3. Kill Javier, fuck the living shit out of JDM, marry Hugh Jackman and ride him all night/day long.

4. Kill Sam, fuck Rachel because she too knows her way around the vajay, and marry katie because she's going scads of money.

5. Finally! Porn stars I'd actually fuck! Kill Josh, fuck Cameron, marry Roman.

6. Kill MIA, fuck Duffy, marry Santigold.

7. Oh man! This is actually really tough. I guess kill Mewes, but I would feel just terrible about it. No wait, kill Jon. No, Mewes. Oh I can't decide! I guess kill Mewes, but I would giving him the best BJ ever before hand as a lovely parting gift, fuck John, marry Paul.