I'm pretty sure I'm about to puke right now. Don't worry, I'm not sick or anything, I'm just excited. And nervous. I won't go into too many details here, because I want to keep it a secret until it officially happens, but right, all I'll say is that I just agreed to do something pretty big, all things considered. Right now, I'm excited and thrilled and pretty fucking terrified all at once. I'm shaking like a leaf and I'm pretty sure I'm about to puke. Strange how good that feels all things considered. Yay! I think...
Anyways, moving on, I'm still working on bulking up so that I can go from being two-dimensional to three. Or four if you buy into that whole "Time as a dimension" thing. Whatever. Anyways, I had a Weight Training class at eight this morning, so I managed to get a decent workout. Yes, I have a class at 8 in the morning. Why? Because I suck at making schedules, that's why.
Anyways, I managed to do a shitload of bicep dumbbell curls. I felt pretty good about myself until I looked over and saw what appeared to be a small mountain lifting weights beside me. Then I realized that it was an actual fucking person. Who knew?
I didn't actually get his name, mostly because I was afraid that if I got within arms reach of him, he would eat me. Let's just call him "The Physical Manifestation of Everything I Hate About My Body". Or Manny for short. Manny's a nice name.
Anyways, Manny was roughly my height, and about twice as big as I was. He was also doing curls using 60 pound weights, while I was doing 15 pound weights. While he beat me physical strength, I'm pretty sure I totally owned him in the Self-Loathing department. Jeremy: 1, Manny: 0. So suck on that!
Anyways, I am now seriously reconsidering my diet. Sure, my boobies are starting to fill out a little bit, but still, my muscles are still woefully small. If anyone can point me in the direction of some seriously cheap-o roids, it would be gratefully appreciated.
Anyways, to play you out, here's a video I like to call "Witef is Wrong with Japanese People?" Cheers!
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Holy Shit, It's Jeremy Feist!
- Jeremy Feist
- Hello, I'm Jeremy Feist, and I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing. For now, I'm juggling my family, my life, and my new career as the world's most unlikely gay porn star. It's complicated.
8 comments:
"While he beat me physical strength, I'm pretty sure I totally owned him in the Self-Loathing department. Jeremy: 1, Manny: 0. So suck on that!"
Wouldn't that be Jeremy: 1, Manny: 1?
Just sayin'.
Oh, and just some unsolicited advice on the weights thing... quality over quantity if you're looking to build bulk muscle mass. A very small amount of curls with a higher weight will pay more dividends than a large number with a lesser weight. Fifteen pounds, pretty much regardless of your size, is only going to get you lean muscle mass for the most part. If you be up on gettin' huge, rock the thirties for not even half as many reps and see what happens.
Also, my "word verification" to enable this comment sounds amusing, like the pre-evolution of the abdominal muscle Pokemon: ablies.
Don't be nervous, Jer--whatever it is, I'm sure your incredibly fabulous self will rock it. Looking forward to getting the details, though, Captain Intrigue....
Oh, and don't overdo the bodybuilding, please! *blech* There are more than enough Mannys in the world.
Inochi! You are alive! And freaking me the hell out!!!
Jeremy, you can't do that! Now I'm all nervous and excited, and I don't even know why!!
TELL US!
Thundercox: Hmmm...Crap, you're right. And I'll give the thirties a try next time, assuming my skinny twig arms aren't ripped from their sockets. And because I can't resist, WHO'S THAT POKEMON? IIIIIIIT'S ABLIES!
meaux: Thanks for the vote of confidence. I'm not gonna be all roid-ragey and junk, but I would like to have SOME muscle mass. Assuming Inochi doesn't kill me in my sleep.
AVB: Not to worry, you'll find out what it is in about a month or so. Sit tight!
jM: NO! SORRY!
A MONTH!? Are you kidding me?! Ugh! Jeremy Alexander Feist!
Is this the same secret thing that I know about?
...I mean, the one about which I have no clue whatsoever?
Because if it is... HOLY SHIT!
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